


A Walk in Creation

by SacredPanda



Series: The Hunt [16]
Category: Exalted, Star Wars Legends: Republic Commando Series - Karen Traviss
Genre: Creation, Custom Spell, Heartbreak, Murder, Theft, sorcery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-04
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-01 23:13:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14531478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SacredPanda/pseuds/SacredPanda
Summary: Jatne intends to fight Ebon Sky, but in an uneven fight good intel is everything. Someone needs to tell him what to expect, someone smarter than Roxil. The only way to do that is to see how Ebon Sky operates.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Memory Walk is not a canon Exalted spell, it's a custom spell Corsenna created for the campaign she built Roxil, it's also the only spell he ever learned. Roxil was not a sorcery type character he was (in Corsenna's words) a claw-it-in-the-face/soak-monster/utility type character. He got some good campaign use out of the spell (he'd traveled across pretty much all of the East side of Creation so he used it frequently to show the Solar Circle cities and other places before they got there) but his non-campaign use ended horribly.

“We need to think carefully about how to bring it up,” A’den had just checked that Roxil was still asleep. He wanted a chance to talk to Kom’rk before he woke.  
“Well we need to think about it quickly. Jat’ika plans to go after him, he’s not listening to us. The sooner we get him intel the better.”  
“What intel does Jat’ika need? Who is he going after?” Much like a cat Roxil had a way of moving silently. They never heard him coming.  
“ _Fierfek_ , we need to put a bell on you. Don’t worry about it. Why don’t you go hunting?”  
“He’s going for Ebon Sky, isn’t he? He can’t win that fight.”  
“His odds get a lot better if he knows how Ebon Sky thinks. You want to save him?” Kom’rk asked, Roxil nodded. “Sure, it’d be better if he didn’t go, but we tried to tell him that already. We need detailed information, how he moves how he fights. Anything you can tell us.” Kom’rk waited but Roxil didn’t say a word. He seemed to be trying to think of something but failing entirely. “ _Shab_ , it’d be better if we could see him ourselves.”  
“Yeah but we can’t. You’ve got to give us something, Roxil.”  
“I… He fights like an Exalt, he moves like an Exalt. I don’t know how to explain it. The best I could do is show you and I can’t,”  
“What do you mean show us? A demonstration?”  
“He’s talking about a Memory Walk,” Vivekka had just returned from her own hunting trip. She leaned in the doorway and was obviously not happy. “It’s dangerous. I won’t allow it.”  
“You’re not in charge of us.”  
“No, but you’re also not in charge of _us_. Only Roxil or myself can initiate the Memory Walk.” She replied.  
“You want Jat’ika to die? We’ve told him he can’t go and he isn’t hearing it. You do know how stubborn we can be.” A’den had a point, but it wasn’t enough to convince them. “Ro’ika, Viv’ika, he needs intel. Every little bit helps.”  
“Even if I did show you, you wouldn’t be able to focus. It took years to learn to hear through the prayers, and it never got less distracting.”  
“Let me start somewhere else. When did you first start hearing them? Show me that and I’ll adjust. Don’t underestimate me.”  
“Kom’ika, don’t ask me to do that to you. In the Memory Walk you would _become_ me. You see what I saw, hear what I heard, and _feel_ what I felt. The prayers started a few days after I Exalted, it may not have been anything like when I was Ebon Sky’s prisoner, but it was still a very painful time. It wasn’t all bad, some of it was entirely enjoyable, but…”  
“Please Roxil, I don’t want Jat’ika to die. We lost him once already.”  
“I don’t want you to die either! I’ve only used Memory Walk on a single mortal; a newlywed, he asked me how it felt when I learned I was going to be a father… so I showed him. The spell was interrupted, Roran never spoke again, he never walked again, he couldn’t even feed or bathe himself. He was all but dead.”  
“A’den and Viv’ika will make sure we’re not interrupted then.” He wasn’t going to give up, Roxil regretted even mentioning it. Roxil sighed and shrugged.  
“Viv, at the first sign of trouble absorb me. That’ll discharge the spell safely. Jaing will have to understand the setback. I can do one day, six days, or a full month; nothing in between. If I start from the day I exalted you’ll have time to adjust to the Walk before the voices start. Kom’ika, that was _not_ a good day, it was full of fear and pain, emotional and physical. You can not give up, if you try to pull yourself out of the Walk it’ll end as badly as if it were interrupted. You must be fully committed.”  
“Just tell me what to do,” He squeezed A’den’s hand, this was sounding worse by the second. He heard the main door open, Jusik was here sooner than he had expected.  
“It’ll take six hours to complete the Walk. Get comfortable, on your side, it’ll be easier that way.” Once Kom’rk positioned himself on the bed Roxil laid down next to him with their foreheads pressed together. He moved Kom’rk’s hands so they were around his head and put his own hands on either side of Kom’rk’s head. “Vivekka, take A’den out of the room. Close the door. Make sure to inform the _jetii_ we’re not to be disturbed.” She nodded and did as she was told. A’den was intent on not moving but as strong as he was a mortal was no match for her strength. Roxil closed his eyes and whispered so quietly Kom’rk couldn’t hear him, but it sounded like he was reciting a poem. Whatever it was made Kom’rk tired, his mind blurred and his eyes closed against his will. When he woke everything was different.

Kom’rk leaned on the shoddy and archaic hand plow, though he wasn’t sure if it could even handles his weight. He wiped the sweat on his forehead with the back of a dirty hand. It didn’t help, his entire body was dripping. This heat wave had to break soon, it hadn’t been so hot this far east in Roxil’s entire memory. He sat in the shade of a large tree and picked up the leather skin he had left there, the wine inside was hot but it was sweet and soothed his dry throat. Looking out over the field he knew he deserved the break, it was already afternoon but he had gotten a lot done.  
“Roxil!” Right, it felt so real but it wasn’t his memory. “I’ve been looking all over for you!” The man was frantically waving, he looked excited. Roxil stood even though his muscles ached and walked over to pull his friend close and kiss him. ”You’re insatiable. Save it for you wife and husband.” He did smile though.  
“My husband says they’ll both die of exhaustion if I don’t relieve myself elsewhere,”  
“Well, your husband sent me to say a certain cleric seems to think Xylithippi will be welcoming a baby today.” Kom’rk had never felt such a rush of exhilaration and fear all at once, it left him breathless for a few moments. Adrenaline surged through his body and the exhaustion of hard labor disappeared entirely.  
“Thizri…?”  
“Shouldn’t you be hunting?” Roxil didn’t even answer the question, there was too much to do. It was tradition in Thizri’s family, on the day of a child’s birth the father hunted; the meat would provide a meal for his wife after the birth and the fur would be used to make a blanket for their child. “Scouts saw some bears to the north!” His friend shouted as Roxil took off. “At the clearing by the small pond!” Bears, it was always bears. His mind raced to translate everything, A’den and Roxil had taught him quite a bit of the language but there was still a lot he had to guess from context. 

-

“Exactly how dangerous is this?” Jusik shook his head. “The emotions are dizzying,”  
“Very,” Vivekka looked tense. A’den must have seen her eying Roxil’s pouch left on the table. He took it and put it in his pocket, looking pointedly in her direction. “By my estimation, he’s still in a good part of the memory, but it goes downhill fast. If you’re intent on staying, _jetii_ , brace yourself and remember, this will be a joyous day compared to what he wants us to show him.”  
“So why are you showing him?”  
“Our hope is that this memory will change his mind. If it doesn’t, we have another plan. If that fails as well…” Her anxiety was obvious. “You know Kom’rk isn’t just seeing and feeling the memory, Roxil has to experience it all again as well. Wasn’t once enough?” She saw Jusik suddenly look toward the room again.

-

This was always the worst part, Kom’rk balanced on the large tree branch near the edge of the clearing. There was only one bear in sight, near enough, it would have to do. He held the handle of his knife between his teeth and tensed his muscles. It was a long drop, if he missed by the smallest amount he would die. It was a perfect jump, he landed on the bear’s back and wrapped his arms around the neck so it couldn’t throw him off. Freeing his hand was when it got dangerous all over again. He knew he only had a few seconds, the beast was backing toward a tree, it would find a away to get free of it’s attacker. He sunk the blade into the bear’s neck still holding on with all his strength. Stabbing was a slow way to kill but he had never been much good with a bow. At least his aim was on point, there was a lot of blood. “Be in peace on your eternal hunt, friend.” He whispered as the creature died. Great, now all he had to do was drag nearly five hundred pounds of dead weight three miles back to the village. He really shouldn’t have gotten up so early to work on the farm, this was the only day that entire week he hadn’t volunteered for labor and still he felt guilty so he put himself to work anyway. Once he had the bear loaded onto a leather tarp he stopped to clean up in the pond. The water was cool and clear and felt refreshing. Kom’rk caught his reflection, Roxil looked unfamiliar without the silver tattoos. The faint burn scars still ran up the entire left side of his body but his two most noticeable scars were absent; the handprint over his heart and the jagged near-crescent shape on his abdomen.  
It took the better part of three hours to get his home back in sight. A huge plume of smoke was rising from the middle, it was too early for the central fire to be lit in this heat. Unless… was he too late? If Thizri was in labor they’d be making a feast to celebrate. He grabbed the corner of the leather tarp and got ready to keep moving. He was nearly there. It was a distant sound that caught his attention, it sounded like a scream. He was pleased to have made a place where children felt free to play, he had never had that in his own childhood. No, that wasn’t playing… he heard it again, it was terror. The smoke and screaming triggered more of Roxil’s memories in Kom’rk’s mind, it was disorienting; the scent of burning flesh, it was his own and it _hurt_. As the memory faded Kom’rk found he had abandoned the tarp and was running as fast his he could.  
When he reached the gate he nearly threw up. A boy – his name was Joran and his family had only come here a week ago – lay dead, face down in the dirt, a bloody knife still gripped in his hand. This couldn’t be happening, he had promised safety to these people. He had promised a home where they could all be at peace, where their work mattered and no one went hungry.  
“You want to die?” A stranger shouted, Roxil knew each and every one of the one hundred three people that lived in this village, that had to be a stranger. “I said _all_ the food goes in the cart! _Now!_ ”  
_No_ , Roxil pried the knife from the boy’s hand. “Be at peace on your eternal hunt, Joran.” He had never killed anyone, he had never even thrown a drunken punch. Today there was a new clear focus in his mind. This was a place of peace and protection, he would kill as many people as it took to save as many as he could. _My wife, my child, these sinners brought violence to family’s home._  
He came in so fast the first bandits didn’t get a chance to react. He grabbed the first one from behind and dragged the knife across his neck, the body dropped at his feet. There were almost a dozen more. He jumped on the next one, knocking him to the ground, the knife slid into the flesh more easily than he would have expected, this was no bear. What they had in numbers Roxil made up for in agility and pure genetic advantage. He was seventeen now, standing a little over six feet tall. Despite being unusually lean he was almost solid muscle, and he _knew_ how to use it. When you hunted bears by hand, a few bandits suddenly got less frightening.  
All around him houses were burning, Roxil had helped build most of them himself. Kom’rk found Roxil’s mind in that moment indescribable, his thoughts were an impossible combination of focused clarity and blind rage. He didn’t know how many were dead now, he couldn’t think about that only about killing the ones that remained. He did know that he still saw six in front him. They needed to die, the awful pain in his side growing worse by the second was his only distraction. One of the bandits laughed, Roxil stumbled forward, his vision blurred. Before he fell completely he saw the broken piece of wood lodged in his flesh. Before his vision went darker he heard one of the bandits shout.  
“Found another one hidden with extra stores! This ones pretty, can we keep her?” It was Thizri, _Roxil’s_ Thizri. She was dirty with blood and soaked in sweat. “There was also a baby down there, don’t worry, I left it.” Roxil struggled back up to his hands and knees, it hurt so much and he didn’t have any strength left. But that was _his_ Thizri, _his_ wife. There was only one person in front of him now in perfect focus. Kom’rk had never seen a woman so beautiful and equally as disturbing. Curled silver horns protruded from her head, her tiny leather dress as well as most of her body dripped with blood. Her eyes were wild but her smile was sweet and almost calming. Roxil tried hard not to fall again, he could feel the blood pooling under his knees. He was really going to die here, after all his _surviving_ he was going to die without ever seeing his child. The tears ran hot down his face but he felt cold.  
The woman’s lips never moved and her smile never faltered but he heard her voice clearly. “Do you want to save them?” She reached a hand out toward him. “Do you want to protect them, and everyone like them?” She didn’t ask if he wanted to _live_ , just if he wanted to save them. It took all his strength to reach back toward her hand.  
“Yes,” His own voice was distant. She took another few steps forward and crouched in front of him at a distance that was easier to reach. “Please help me save them!”

-

“ _Osik_ ,” Jusik couldn’t think of a better word. The pain was staggering, he had never felt such a strong urge to get away. A’den just watched impatiently, torn between wanting to know what Jusik felt and wanting nothing to do with it. All the color was drained from the Jedi’s face and he looked defocused, still staring at the bedroom door.  
“Bard’ika, tell me what’s happening.”  
“I don’t know, but there’s so much … heartbreak. Rage and love and hatred all mixed together. I don’t know how else to say it, it’s just overwhelming. If these are the things Roxil feels … I’m _glad_ he’s a void in the force. I can’t imagine feeling that all the time. This raw animal urge to kill, it reeks of the dark side, it’s awful.”

-

The next few minutes could have easily been hours or seconds. The smell of blood and fire filled Kom’rk’s nose and for a moment he thought it could have been worse than the sickener. He tore flesh with his teeth, pouncing on the remaining bandits until there was no life left in them. Finally he dropped to his knees panting and for the briefest of moments he didn’t recognize his own blood-soaked hands covered in fur and adorned with vicious claws. It must have been the exhaustion, the blood loss, he was obviously hallucinating because when he looked again it was his own skin under all the filth.  
“Roxil!” A man ran through the crowd of people that had gathered and threw his arms around Roxil’s neck and kissed his cheek.  
“Arkur,” Roxil was so tired, he nuzzled his husband’s neck and sobbed. “Thizri? She was here,”  
“She’s safe, how could you?”  
“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry Arkur, I never wanted to kill-”  
“No! You saved us!” The man held Roxil’s face in his hands to look him in the eyes. “Why didn’t you tell us? When we found those tablets in the old temple, the prophecy about the return of Catman’s progeny, that was you?” In truth Arkur wasn’t much better at reading than Roxil, he recognized most of the characters but he couldn’t put them together quite right. The tablets spoke of the city god that had long since disappeared when the temple fell into disrepair, the god was known as Cahtumin. “You never told us you were a god.”  
“I …” Could that be right? Could he be the return of Catman? The fur the claws, the mauled bodies of raiders; it made sense. “I didn’t know.” He let Arkur lead him to the pool in the front of the temple where he slipped into the water and let the blood flow off his skin.  
“I’m going to find Thizri for you, and your son.”  
“I have …” He felt so much relief and joy after the fear and adrenaline of the first real battle in his life. “I have a son,” It didn’t feel real.  
“He’s safe, he’s alive, Roxil he’s perfect.” Arkur stepped aside when a woman brought a small bundle of cloth and placed it in Roxil’s arms telling him Thizri was resting, Roxil didn’t want her to see him such a mess anyway. All he wanted to do was hold his child and get sleep but he couldn’t get a moment of quiet. People were thanking him, bringing him wine and food and even a few dozen marriage proposals. For now at least he would have to be content looking at the new infant with happy tears streaming down his face; his family was alive. When he was finally left in peace late at night to rest with his wife, husband, and their new son, it didn’t last. He was just falling asleep when he felt the mattress shift as though someone was standing on it. Arkur and Thizri were asleep already, Roxil opened his eyes and found himself staring into a strange face. A woman with short black hair and narrowed bright blue eyes was crouching over him. He was fascinated by the silver tattoos all across her skin. He had heard of that before, where? He suddenly recalled hearing stories about the Anathema, he had heard so many terrible stories about the tricksters. He was instantly ready to fight again, but what could he even do against one the moon children?  
“Calm down, moron.” She laughed. “You’ll wake the baby.”  
“If you’ve touched Adan-”  
“You saw Luna, didn’t you? She comes in many faces so think _carefully_.”  
“That woman with the horns?”  
“The watcher, you saw the Silver-horned watcher?” The woman looked at him suspiciously. “You’ll need to come with me.”  
“I’m not going anywhere with you.”  
“Alright stay then, you’ll eventually mutate, go insane, kill everyone you love, and we’ll end up sending a whole team to put you down. That sound like fun to you? You’ve been chosen by Luna. You need to have your caste fixed or things get bad, but _I_ need to be on the move. There’s a gathering and I’m expected to be there so you’ll be there too.”  
“I’ve been … chosen?”  
“Yes, that is what I said.” She was clearly annoyed. “Now get _moving_.”  
“How long?” Arkur rolled over and wrapped an arm across Roxil’s chest.  
“Three days there, three nights at the gathering, three days back.” She stood and tossed a bag at him from a hook on the wall. “Now pack up. We’re going.” Arkur kissed Roxil’s forehead and got up to pack him some preserved meats and a few skins of wine. He even asked about going with Roxil but the presented idea of being surrounded by a hundred drunk Lunar Exalts didn’t sound particularly safe.  
“Love, you’ll be safer when you come back, yeah? You’ll be able to keep us all safe.” He kissed Roxil, though he was sad to see him go. There was no other choice so Roxil left, he wasn’t at all happy about it. The woman – Tawasu – kept up a grueling running pace, Roxil might have kept up any other day but he was still so _tired_. Kom’rk could feel the full weight of his body. “Rest, eat, whatever you need we’re moving again in ten minutes.” She dug a roll of paper out of her own map. “I’ll give you an hour if you study up on what you need to know for the gather. I’ve got names, information, and portraits of all the elders that will be present.” She handed him the scroll. “Try not to have any problems, I’m going to hunt.”  
“I have a problem,”  
“You haven’t even started.”  
“I can’t read this.”  
“Did my seer get the language wrong? She’s never gotten it wrong,”  
“Let me rephrase that, I can’t read.”  
“You really are a moron,” She was extremely attractive, but very rude. “Doesn’t matter anyway, Maaki caught up to us. I’m going to let her decide your caste, just answer her questions and keep your mouth shut the rest of the time. She’s supposed to be asleep for seventy more years so she’s probably grumpy.” A woman stepped out of the trees wearing a tiny black silk dress and a featureless silver mask. Maaki was definitely a lot more fun, they did very little _talking_ while Tawasu was hunting. She asked him a few questions about how he would solve particular problems, but his answers were predictable, he preferred a stealthy approach when possible. It was what came next that made him like Maaki a little less.  
She put her pack against a tree and told him to lean forward onto it. He waited like that until moon was fully out. At the point she pulled out a bottle of what appeared to be liquid silver, a small hammer, and a large spike.  
“This isn’t going to feel good, is it?”  
“No honey,” It sounded like she was smiling under behind her mask. “It’s not.” Kom’rk had experienced plenty of physical pain in his life, but Roxil’s near death even paled in comparison to this. The silver was hot, the spike she was using to break his skin was huge, and she didn’t let up for five hours straight.  
“Just two more nights of that and you’ll be proper Changing Moon.”  
“Two more?” She had covered his back and his arms, his skin burned whenever he moved. He drank through all three of his wine skins to relax enough to sleep that night. When they arrived at the gathering point he still consumed an entire barrel of wine and another of ale. No one seemed to mind, there was more alcohol here than he had ever seen in his life. They lit a huge fire and brought in dozens of animals to cook, and a vast assortment of brightly colored fruits and drinks. There were people changing shapes in every direction Kom’rk looked, human beast hybrids danced, played music, and fought each other for bragging rights. There was a massive orgy that Roxil joined for a time before climbing into a tree to finally get some sleep. The festivities were still going full speed when he woke up.  
_Catman,_ He looked around but he couldn’t see anyone trying to get his attention. There was probably another cat spirit around with this many Lunars gathered together but he was sure he knew that voice. _Catman, hurry back to us!_ It was someone else, but still so familiar. Roxil shook his head, had he drank too much before his nap? _Catman, we miss you!_ That time he could have sworn he heard Thizri, but that was impossible.  
“Excuse me,” He tapped a half lizard man on the shoulder. “Have you heard anyone calling for a Catman? I keep hearing it, but I can’t see anyone looking for me.”  
“Who would be looking for you, fresh blood?” The man laughed with one of his friends.  
“He doesn’t even have all his tattoos and he thinks someone would be looking for him, adorable.”  
“Ah, there you are Roxil,” Maaki approached behind him and both the other young Lunars looked in shock.  
“No one except a famous Elder apparently,” The lizard said under his breath.

“He called you an elder? So that means you’re important right?”  
“Well, you don’t get to be five thousand six years old without being important, now do you?” She laughed when Roxil dropped his wine. His mouth opened and closed several times but he never managed to say anything. “Close your mouth darling, you look silly. I need a favor.”  
“Of… of course.” He followed her hand when she pointed out a young man with red stripes painted across his skin. Dozens of people flocked around him but he ignored them. “His mentor has been a problem for our project in the past. That boy, Auspicious Feather, is his favorite. He plays errand boy for his master regularly and knows _all_ his secrets. He also has a lose tongue with plenty wine and a pretty enough man. You’re pretty, do you see where this is going?”  
“You want me drink with him?”  
“No I want get him drunk and fuck him in the forest.” She obviously meant it. “When you’ve got him good and worn out ask about Halta’s trade routes and contracts.” _Catman, my sister is ill in Harakuema, I need you to take me. Please come back,”_ Harakuema, that was one of _his_ villages. Maaki was still talking to him, he shook his head again and tried hard to focus on her words. “Their problem is that their trying woo him, he likes the direct approach. It shouldn’t be a problem if you just saunter up and ask him politely to bend you over.”  
“Wait, me? So when you said you want me to fuck him, you really meant…”  
“I really don’t care as long as you get him talking. You have a husband don’t you?”  
“Several, but they all prefer taking it.”


	2. Captive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vivekka has a plan to convince Kom'rk not to push for more memories of Ebon Sky. One day; far from the worst - though Kom'rk will wonder how that's possible - but far from the easiest as well. Kom'rk thought he understood pain, this was entirely different.

“Here, this’ll help.” She took a small pouch off the chain around her neck and put just a tiny bit of the strange sparkling powder on the tip of her finger.  
“What is it?”  
“Don’t worry about that right now, just breath it in. It’ll make you feel great, I promise.” She patted his head when he obeyed. Kom’rk’s vision blurred for a moment, the lights and sounds grew more intense and the scenery was splashed with colors he hadn’t seen before; it was spectacular. He also felt like he had twice as much energy. He walked straight up to Auspicious Feather, looking straight into his golden eyes. The man looked back but neither said anything. Roxil simply got down on his knees and tugged the cloth around Feather’s waist until it came free. Feather didn’t respond except to spread his thighs slightly. He didn’t react at all when Roxil kissed his thighs, when he parted his lips however the man slid his hips forward a little more and smirked. Instead Roxil kissed his way up the man’s chest, grabbed his goblet and took a large drink before kissing Feather, a trickle of the sweet wine dripping down his chin.  
“You’re brave, aren’t you, New Blood? How fresh are you?” His voice was smoother than silk, alluring in a way Roxil hadn’t expected.  
“Three days,” Roxil said drinking more of Feather’s wine, the flavor alone was intoxicating though that was probably whatever Maaki had given him. “I’m bored, take me into the forest?” The colors swarmed in Auspicious Feather as he took hold of Roxil’s chin and looked in his eyes.  
“Show me why I should.” His words sent a shiver down Roxil’s spine and made him eager. He dropped back onto his knees and used just his tongue to maneuver Feather’s length into his mouth. He bobbed his head slowly at first, looking up at Feather through his eyelashes. He knew he had an audience, but at the moment he didn’t care. Auspicious Feather tangled his fingers in Roxil’s hair and bucked his hips ramming himself into Roxil’s throat, he didn’t look it at all but he was incredibly strong. He held Roxil’s head in place with no visible effort. Roxil could barely breathe but he didn’t let that stop him. He rubbed his tongue hard against the cock and hummed sending vibrations through Feather’s body. “You’re not shy, are you, New Blood?” He released his grip on Roxil’s head.  
“Would it be more fun if I were?” Roxil couldn’t help grinning when Feather laughed, it was the first real show of emotion he had seen.  
“I like you. Perhaps the Shishimissi bitch could be persuaded to let me keep you.”  
“I’m not a pet,” He licked the tip of Feather’s erection and got a small moan in return. “And I’m starting to feel a little neglected. Are you interested or not?”  
“Oh I’m very interested.” He downed the rest of his wine and waved for someone to bring him more as he stood. Roxil started wandering off toward the woods but Feather grabbed his arm and spun him around. He easily pushed Roxil down so he was leaning forward against the chair. Feather simply tore his pants away leaving him completely naked for the crowd.  
“Here?”  
“Right here,” Feather ran a hand along Roxil’s side. “Unless you’re going to start playing shy.”  
“Never,” He accepted one of the goblets a woman brought to them and drank the whole thing. Feather knelt on one knee behind him, some of his wine spilling onto Roxil’s back in the process. Feather simply licked it away before rubbing the tip of a finger against Roxil’s entrance. “I’ve never-”  
“Been with a man?”  
“Not on this end,” He gasped when the finger was pushed in up to the knuckle. It was uncomfortable, but not intolerable. He shifted his hips, though he had never felt it personally he knew exactly what needed to happen. Feather was apparently intent on not allowing it, he dragged his finger out just as Roxil was getting where he wanted to be.  
“Then you’ll take exactly what I give you and nothing more. Can’t have you getting too excited just yet, not until you’re ready for me.” Feather pressed in again with a slow thrusting motion adding a second finger a few seconds later. Roxil winced, it stung a little but the wine was kicking in at least. After spreading his fingers a few times Feather finally went for the prostate rubbing against it for a while before ramming a finger against it hard. Roxil rocked back and moaned, looking right at one of the spectators. Feather didn’t give him much time to prepare but he did pour a line of the same glittering powder Maaki had given him onto the arm of his chair, he poured a second line on Roxil’s back and inhaled it. Kom’rk willed Roxil not to take it but of course he did without hesitation. The haze in his mind was renewed, the sounds and colors intensified even further. He felt warm, and dizzy like he was spinning. He was still trying to get his orientation back when he felt something slick press against him, Feather snapped his hips forward entering him completely in one swift motion. That _hurt_.  
Roxil closed his eyes tight and tried his best to relax but between the drug, the wine, and the relentless thrusting he couldn’t make it happen. He could barely hear Feather’s grunting over the sound of his own heartbeat pounding in his head. The voices were still there too, their number increasing by the minute. It sounded like their must have been hundreds of people in his head drowning out the sound of his own thoughts.  
“Fuck,” This was starting to feel good, better than that, it was great. He couldn’t resist the urge to touch himself still looking at the spectators but he wasn’t really seeing them anymore. He rested his head on the chair and let the sensations overwhelm him. Kom’rk however, couldn’t focus on a single thing Roxil was thinking or feeling; he had been in enough battles to be accustomed to noise but not like this, not when the noise was _in_ his mind. Combined with the noise from the Gathering it was too much and Feather was groaning in his ear and he needed to get away from it. Kom’rk was too disoriented to realize those were Roxil’s feelings as much as his own, the pleasure wasn’t enough of a distraction. He hadn’t even been aware of pushing Feather away and stumbling to his feet, by the time he realized he was moving he was already well into the forest. He dropped onto his knees with his forehead pressed to the ground, both hands clutching his head. Someone touched his shoulder, he sat back up to see a stranger grinning at him.  
“It’s been a while, but I don’t remember new blood being so weak. What, can’t handle a little fun?”  
“Shut up!” He stood and tried to stumble away from the stranger but the guy grabbed his arm.  
“No need to be rude, I was just teasing,”  
“Shut up, shut up, shut up!” The shift into the Lunar war form was so natural he didn’t even feel it. It was instantaneous, more like a reflex than a conscious action. The other man shifted the moment Roxil took a swing at him, he wasn’t using a war form but the shape of a strangler serpent, his spirit shape. It was a lost fight right from the start; Roxil was still dizzy and the voices disoriented him, in truth he didn’t know why he was fighting at all. He took a solid hit to the jaw and tasted blood, he took another hit in the ribs and another in the gut before he could find his balance again. No, finding his balance would be impossible when he couldn’t even think, he just threw all his weight into the next strike. Before hitting his target he felt a sharp pain in his chest, there was a sickening snapping sound that went with it. Maaki stood where he had been moments ago, but his entire body had been lifted from the ground, he skidded several feet before slamming against a tree.  
“This ends now!” Tawasu shouted, her hand around the reptile’s throat. “We have enough to worry about with the Solars back, we’re _not_ going to fight each other!” Roxil struggled to his feet and lunged forward despite the pain in his ribs but Maaki caught him and held his arms behind his back with ease. The harder he fought against her the tighter he pulled his arms, he hadn’t expected her to be so powerful.  
“He started it!” The lizard spat.  
“And now I’m finishing it,” Tawasu shifted to her own war form, a cat like Roxil but with brilliantly red fur. “I may not like him but he’s my student. Touch him again and you’ll be fighting me, sound like fun?” The lizard glared at him for a moment then turned back to Tawasu.  
“Fine.” He was released, so was Roxil but he wasn’t done fighting. Maaki was back in front of him in less than a second with a hand against his forehead.  
“Sleep,” She said, everything went black before Kom’rk woke up.

“Time’s up,” Roxil whispered, he looked exhausted. Kom’rk didn’t answer at first. Back in his own mind he was sure he could get a handle on his own thoughts; he just needed a moment to adjust to the _quiet_ again.  
“I’m ready, I don’t want to waste any time.” He honestly could have used a break but if he waited too long he might second guess himself. Vivekka came in but before she could say what she wanted they all heard the main door open.  
“Roxil,” She put a hand on his shoulder. “If he insists, let me handle this one.”  
“What are you thinking?”  
“I’m thinking you need to rest, the Walk is too tiring. Don’t worry, I’ll show him that he doesn’t want this. One day. It’s far from the worst, but he’ll know after that. He’ll know it’s too much.”  
“What day, Vivekka?” It looked like Roxil already knew what she was thinking and it made his heart sink.  
“Xylithippi,”  
“No, I can’t…”  
“I’ve got this Roxil.”  
“No you don’t.” Roxil sighed covering his face with a hand. “You can’t numb yourself when it’s over.”  
“Jedi, if you didn’t enjoy feeling the first walk you should head to Keldabe if that’s far enough away.” Vivekka shrugged when he shook his head; it was stupid for him to suffer needlessly but it was his choice.  
“You guys are making me nervous,”  
“Good, Kom’ika. That’s good.” She hoped Kom’rk would back out but she knew he wouldn’t. “All the fear, anger, and misery when our home burned around us, when we saw that innocent boy dead, when we were going to die… That was nothing, it _does_ get worse.” Roxil reclined back onto the bed again.  
“Let’s get this over with. Brace yourself, this day starts in pain, it does not get better and it does not get easier. Remind yourself as often as necessary that it’s just one day, twenty four hours and you’re out. “ Roxil could see that they really were making Kom’rk nervous. He was smart, intensely so, smart men knew when to be afraid. Unfortunately he was also brave to a fault, being afraid wouldn’t stop him from doing what he thought he had to. They took their positions again and Roxil summoned his remaining essence as he began the chant. If he delayed, he risked losing his own nerve, it was better to start sooner rather than later. The moment Kom’rk was out Jusik’s face changed. Roxil had warned them that the memory would start with pain, he hadn’t exactly been clear about how much.

-

Kom’rk wanted to scream, Roxil was huddled on the floor in a pool of blood his entire body bruised but that was the least of his pain, his hands and feet were discarded at his side. He looked down as the last replacement was completed, at least he was free of the silver shackles. Roxil shook and cried but remained quiet. Kom'rk was surprised by how thin Roxil was; the Lunar had been slim as long as he had known him but now he was clearly malnourished. His hips were severe angles, his ribs clearly visible under his skin, and he was disturbingly pale. Ebon sat across from him on a plush black chair with a satisfied grin. Roxil flinched when Ebon stood and approached him but all he did was secure a new shackle around Roxil’s neck.  
The overwhelming feeling of love caught Kom’rk off guard though it was mixed with an equal measure of hatred. It was something he couldn’t quite describe. He knew Ebon Sky was terrible – violent and merciless – but Roxil couldn’t help it. When he looked at Ebon it was like remembering thousands of years of unconditional love. When Ebon spoke he felt a compulsion to listen and obey.  
“I meant what I said,” His voice was soft and kind, not at all like the man himself. “Free yourself in five minutes and you can go. How long did it take you?” Roxil didn’t answer at first, he held his breath to stop sobbing, he was in so much pain.  
“Five minutes, twenty-three seconds.” Roxil fell over and abandoned his effort to stop the tears.  
“Good effort though, big guy. That’s a full minute of improvement from last time.” Ebon kicked Roxil hard in the ribs making him cough blood, his healing wasn’t working. “I’ve just had the most wonderful idea of how to punish you for failing! You just go right ahead and get comfortable, I’ll be out for a few hours.”  
“I need water,” He hardly had the will to speak at all. Ebon kept fires burning indefinitely in the stone basement, he liked it hot – very hot.  
“And I thought I was being such a generous host, my apologies.” He dropped a full skin, it fell just out of Roxil’s reach, and left. The relief was unexpected; Roxil was still in more pain than he could live with but at least there was a temporary reprieve before he would experience more. He tried to reach for the water, gravel digging into his skin, but he gave up quickly. He was tired and in pain, he retreated into his mind to listen to the prayers.  
Kom’rk felt relief when Roxil finally achieved some level of relaxation. He had given up on reaching the water, his neck was sore and bruised from pulling against the chain. Working for it just made him feel more dehydrated. He leaned back against the dirty leather tarps meant to be his bed and sighed. Wondering what Ebon had planned would only make him tense again, he needed to keep his mind from wandering. It wasn’t like there was anything he could do to keep busy. Normally he’d hunt, but the Moonsilver chains kept him from escaping. He might also find a reasonably attractive human but again, the chains were a problem. In the absence of a human companion he might even give in and touch himself, but the environment and conditions weren’t going to help him get anywhere with that.  
_It’s been so long since we’ve had a stranger around, especially one like this…_ A stranger? Roxil knew that voice, Ame Kinsei in Xylithippi, what was a stranger doing in Xylithippi? Shortly later the prayers increased. His people were screaming and begging him for help. He pulled hard enough against the chain that the soulsteel supports in the walls creaked but he couldn’t free himself. He could hear them dying, he could hear them crying for him to come to their rescue and he couldn’t do anything. Xylithippi was burning and all Roxil could do was cry. He had tried several more times to escape, his neck was raw and bleeding but it was no use.  
By the time the prayers died down there were only one hundred voices he recognized from Xylithippi remaining. They asked for retribution, they asked why he had abandoned them. A painful numbness settled over him, he had run out of tears and couldn’t even summon the will to move when he heard the door opened. It sounded like two pairs of feet on the steps but he couldn’t even turn his head. Ebon dropped an unconscious body on him, he knew her, his great-great-great-great-granddaughter.  
“My dinner is beautiful, isn’t it?” Ebon Sky really shouldn’t have said that. Roxil was long passed his limit of sanity already, he had barely held himself together. That was the last straw, his mind snapped. He felt the effects of Luna’s Kiss just moments before he lost all control. He was aware of shifting to his war form and he could feel the chain break from his fresh strength and the flesh tearing under his claws, he heard shouting but even the false kiss was enough to push him out of reality. It was the sharp pain in his abdomen that brought him back. He dropped to his knees and winced when Ebon drove the sword clear through him. “You know,” He wiped blood from his face and grabbed a cloth and clean up the deep gouges on his chest. “I was going to let her live.” He looked over, the woman was waking up. Ebon walked over casually and dragged her up by her hair, holding her in front of Roxil until her eyes slowly started to open.  
“Catman? You came to save me?” That was the last thing she would ever say. Roxil tried to keep fighting when Ebon pulled the sword from his flesh; between the hunger pains, the dehydration, and now the blood loss he was just too slow. Ebon dropped the body in Roxil’s arms and snapped a fresh collar around his neck. “Always remember, _always_ , it was you that killed her.”  
Ebon walked away to finish cleaning himself up and rest while he healed. It was too much; he was beyond tears. He sobbed over the body, nothing more than painful gasps he felt in his whole body. Three thousand eight hundred and seven people had died that die. He knew each and every one of them even though he hadn’t been to Creation since the first of them was born. He had never regretted that more than he did in this moment. Kom’rk couldn’t even bring himself to be relieved when he woke up. All he could do was run straight to the freshers to throw up. Vivekka was there in seconds rubbing his back gently.  
“I’m so sorry,” She whispered.


End file.
